Free Falling into the Future
I often jump into the abysses. I must enjoy the thrill of the dark cave, the unknown space I am constantly falling into. This is what usually happens--I get a great idea and things begin to go well. I might be writing, opening an art gallery, I might be having lots of clients, funerals to perform. Then there is a dry spell and I think "Oh, my-- I better get a job. How will I pay my bills? I spend hours on end searching for a "job" (as we all find ourselves doing at some point.) Finally that "job" comes through and I am relieve, a relief that is short lived. Not long after business (whatever business idea I was working on at the time) starts to pick up. People are calling and suddenly I have too many clients. I can't fit them all in because--I have a "job." I have to punch the time clock--I race to keep up with it all and nothing works. I can't keep up and I make myself crazy trying.